No Good Deed
by Ysidro
Summary: ...goes unpunished. Lichen's only talent seems to be making Snape's life a little more hectic. Lichen's back and terrorizing Snape even more. Story nine is up. Please review!
1. Stories 1, 2, 3

Disclaimer: All Harry Potter related characters belong to J.K. Rowling and Queen Clairion belongs to Disney. Lichen and all the other faeries belong to me.

No Good Deed...

By Ysidro

Story 1

Severus saves a faerie.

Severus knew he shouldn't have listened; he knew he should have just ignored the screaming. He would have been better off, or at least he tried to convince himself of it. It couldn't be undone now anyways.

The distinct sound of a screaming faerie had interrupted his harvesting of Eyebright that fateful night. The Potions teacher had jerked his head up, upsetting the delicate flowers and turning them into a useless pulp. He had cursed under his breath as he watched the fruits of his labor fall to the ground.

With a sigh, Severus had followed the sound of the squealing voice. It was on the way back to the castle, so he had figured it wouldn't do any harm. He was wrong.

A very small faerie dressed in green and brown was trying to ward off a fully-grown hawk. It was waving a spear hardly larger than a toothpick at the bird, which seemed to just be making it angrier. Blood was pouring out of the faerie's tiny limbs, but it seemed to be willing to fight anyways.

"Get out of the way you damned bird!" Severus yelled, pulling out his wand. "Stupefy!"

The hawk froze in the middle of an attack, and fell off the branch where the epic battle had taken place. Severus stalked over to check on the stupid pixie he had just saved. At least he could tell the damned pixie off.

"Ack!" the little male faerie yelled. He fumbled for his toothpick as Severus drew nearer. "You're one of THEM!"

"Bloody Hell," Severus said, rolling his eyes as he approached the valiant sprite. "I'm not going to hurt you; I'm here to help."

"Oh," the faerie looked at him reproachfully as he flinched. Then, he tottered to a stand and puffed out his tiny chest. "The great Prince Lichen of the Faeries doesn't need help."

"Fine, then I'll just un-stupefy that hawk and be on my way," Severus responded, turning his heel slowly.

"No…wait!" the faerie's voice was faint now. Severus turned back to the creature. "I guess I could use a Big's help."

"My name is Severus," he replied, taking a vial of Phoenix tears out of one of his robe's many pockets. "I am a wizard."

Severus uncorked the vial and placed a drop of the liquid on the faerie's head. In a moment, the creature was soaked in tears and the wounds healed instantaneously. Lichen looked up at Severus in awe.

"Wow!" he said, looking down at his now healed wounds. "That was amazing! You're not too bad for a Big…I mean wizard."

"You're welcome," Severus replied dismissively. "Now I will be on my way."

"Waaaaaaaait!" the faerie, Lichen, said, flying so he was in front of Snape's nose. "You can't leave yet! You've got to meet my parents."

"Thank you for your invitation, but I really must be going," Severus replied, trying desperately to swat the faerie away. "I'm sure your parents are wonderful."

"Why thank you for the complement."

The feminine voice was high but commanding; the voice of a royal, of that Severus had no doubt. He watched in well-hidden amazement as a faerie dressed in a rose-petal gown flew before him in a pumpkin carriage drawn by swallows. Her tiny heart-shaped face was regal and she exited the carriage on a stray branch.

"I am Queen Clairion of the Faeries of the Forbidden Forest," she said, looking up at the Potions teacher. "Thank you for saving my son. He tends to be very…unruly when there's danger afoot. I try to tell him to leave the defending to the guards, but he must interfere whenever he can."

Severus nodded his head in agreement, remembering Potter's total disregard for any sort of rule. He bowed slightly out of sheer habit. Though the queen was only about as tall as his finger, she gave off an air of royalty.

"You're more than welcome Your Highness," Snape said, snickering inwardly at the irony of that comment. "I know what it's like dealing with…over-enthusiastic students."

"His name's Severus Mum," Lichen said, flying over to the Queen. She looked barely older than him. "Can we show him the Village Mum? Can we? Can we please?"

"As long as Severus promises never to reveal our location, then he may see it."

Severus didn't really care about seeing the Faerie Village, but he figured he wasn't getting any younger. Faeries generally did not reveal themselves to people, let alone adults. He decided to take up the offer.

"I promise I will never reveal the location of the Faerie Village."

Severus watched as from out of the surrounding trees, tiny specs of light began to form. As he peered closer, Severus realized each was a faerie surrounded by an orb of illumination. It was a truly magical sight as over one-hundred faeries began to show themselves to the wizard.

"Thank you for saving our Prince!" they all cheered in unison. "You are welcome to come here whenever you like!"

"You're welcome faeries," Snape was smiling now, in spite of himself. The whole situation seemed ethereal, and it probably was. "I really must be going however. I have classes to teach in the morning."

A unified sigh echoed through the Village as Severus waved good-bye. Severus was fairly sure he would never be returning; he had never been fond of faeries; pickled or otherwise. He turned around and set off on his journey back to the castle. Unfortunately, solitude was never an option when faeries were involved.

"Why did you leave?" the voice of the faerie Lichen came from behind the Potions teacher. "Were you afraid or something? I should have told some people keep their lights off."

"No, I was not afraid," Severus replied scathingly. "I am not a people…or faerie… person, that's all. It is of no offense to you or your kind; I prefer to be alone."

"So you're afraid of being around others then," Lichen deduced. "That means we're going to have to fix that."

"There will be no 'fixing' me Lichen!" Snape yelled at the faerie, blowing him a few inches away. "I am completely fine by myself thank you."

"Well aren't you a thorny one Severus." The faerie had re-gained his composure and was now walking on air. "A few days with me though, and we'll get all those prickles out of you."

Thus, the unlikely friendship of Prince Lichen and Severus Snape was formed. From that day forward, Lichen ensured to stay stuck on Snape like a burr to a trouser-leg. And, though Snape would never admit it to anyone, he enjoyed the company.

**************

Story 2

Lichen learns how to mark

"What are you doing?" Lichen said looking up at Severus as he leaned against an inkwell. "Looks complicated."

"I'm trying to mark essays for Lupin," Severus scowled at the faerie. "Poorly done essays."

"Uh huh," Lichen nodded, his pointy green hat bobbing up and down. Severus was fairly certain the only reason it stayed on was because he was magical. "What are they about?"

"Boggarts," Snape replied, gesturing towards Lichen with a flick of his quill. "Now, kindly rest your back against something else Lichen; I do need ink."

"What's a boggart?" Lichen asked as he strode across the desk and sat on a pile of parchment. "Sounds like something that comes out of your nose."

Lichen made an overly-expressive grimace, his hat pointing downwards in disgust. He definitely made Snape's life…interesting. Despite Severus's oath to keep the location of the Faerie Village a secret, Lichen refused to keep himself scarce.

"It is a shapeless being that takes the form of what you fear most," Snape sighed. "They like dark places to hide."

"Like you?" Lichen replied innocently, his green eyes staring at him.

Severus had never thought of that. It was a rather odd comparison; one that most people would not make if they knew what was good for them. Then again, Lichen had hit his prime when he was 20, and would continue possessing that naivety until the end of time.

"I am not hiding," Snape protested as he dipped his quill in the ink again. "I merely do not require company during every single moment of my existence."

"Oh," was the response the Potions' teacher got from his vertically-challenged companion.

For the next few minutes, Lichen was silent for once. This was a very rare, though not unappreciated, occurrence. After a while though, Snape couldn't stand it. What in the world was the little faerie so damned focused on?

"Says here you were someone's boggart," Lichen said, chuckling to himself. "He made you wear a dress and a stuffed vulture hat!"

"Let me see that!" Snape said, snatching the piece of parchment from under the faerie's bottom. Luckily, Lichen unfurled his wings fast enough to regain his balance. The small blond faerie hovered in the air behind Snape's shoulder as he read, resembling a demented conscience angel.

"Longbottom," Snape sneered, not bothering to read over the essay. He scrawled a large red "F" in red ink over the front of it. "Not even worth the parchment it's written on."

"What does 'F' stand for?" Lichen inquired, browsing the essay. "It means Fantastic, right?"

"Sure Lichen."

"Then 'A' must mean 'Amazing!'" Lichen started going on a tangent. "And 'B' is 'Brilliant!' Of course 'C' is…uh…'Creative' and a 'D' is 'Delightful!' Why isn't there an 'E' for 'Excellent?' And why do you stop at 'F?' I mean, there's…uh…21 other letters in the alphabet, why don't you use them? You could give someone an 'L' for 'Love It!'"

"I will let you know if I find an essay that is so poorly done that it deserves an 'L' if it will please you Lichen," Severus mumbled, continuing his marking. Snape suppressed a smile as Lichen settled himself on a pewter paperweight in the shape of a mini chair on his desk. It was Lichen's impromptu seat during their conversations.

"Jingly," Lichen replied, which Snape assumed was a good thing according to faeries.

There were a few moments of blessed silence interrupted only by the scratching of Severus' quill. Lichen amused himself by flying about the potions' ingredients and making faces in the glass. Having an attention span as short as himself however, Lichen soon began to talk.

"I know what my boggart would be," Lichen said, more to himself than to Snape. "It'd be a hawk. Those things scare me to pieces. They're big and terrifying and…pointy."

"And I'm not?" Snape replied, putting down his quill. "Lichen, why don't I terrify you? I am a human am I not? I thought you and you're kind were afraid of humans…especially adults."

"You're different Sev," Lichen said, settling down on the chair once again. "Most humans wouldn't have saved me when I got attacked by that hawk, but you did. You've got a good heart under those black robes."

"Apparently you're the only one who can see it."

"Isn't that enough?"

The pair remained silent for the rest of the evening.

**************

Story 3

Severus celebrates a birthday

"Happy Birthday Sev!" Lichen yelled in a very high and squeaky voice as Snape entered his office. The Potions teacher nearly had a heart attack as the faerie flew up to his face. "You're forty! I remember when I turned forty…it was…uh…okay, so maybe I don't remember. But I bet it was great!"

"Lichen, I am not one to celebrate birthdays," Severus responded as he re-gained his composure. If the faerie expected him to live another year, he would have to announce his presence in a less abrupt fashion. "One doesn't usually like to know they have one year less to live."

"Oh, stop being so thorny," Lichen scoffed, hovering in the air near Snape's nose. "Let's celebrate! I got a whole bunch of faeries together and we made you a cake!"

Severus had never been given a birthday cake before. Not by a friend anyways. His mother would try to scrounge up enough money to splurge on a cake for his birthday, but no one ever took the time to actually bake one for him. He absently wiped his eyes, telling himself he was just having an allergic reaction to the ever-present pollen on Lichen's wings.

"Okay everyone, come on out!"

Severus watched in utter amazement as at least one hundred faeries popped out of nowhere. All of them were wearing the same expression; one of sheer euphoria. And at least twenty of them were helping to hold up a cake on a carved wooden plate.

"Can we put this thing down now Prince Lichen?" whined one of the male faeries supporting the cake. "It's really heavy."

"Okay Squash," Lichen replied, snickering at the irony of his fellow's name. "You may now put down the cake."

Severus watched in amazement as the faeries surrounded the cake. Light-talent faeries buzzed in with forty fireflies in their wake. He could hardly believe it as the pastry, decorated in flowers and acorns, lit up the darkness of his office, and his heart.

"Happy Birthday Severus," greeted Lichen's parents, Queen Clairion and King Mortimer. They flew down to his desk in a carriage drawn by dragonflies. "May you experience many more."

"Thank you Your Highnesses," Severus said out of sheer habit, bowing slightly. "I cannot begin to express my gratitude for your hospitality."

"Aw, quit yattering and blow out the fireflies Sev!" Lichen said, clapping his hands and fluttering up and down. "Let's eat!"

Severus felt his eyes water again as he bent down to blow out his fireflies. Happy Birthday was sung one hundred out-of-tune voices strong as Severus let out a very gentle breath so none of his guests blew away. The fireflies turned off in unison, as if they were in fact candles.

"Thank you," was all Severus was able to say through his tears. "Thank you all for the cake."

"Cake time!" yelled Lichen as he did a swan-dive right into the cake's center. The next words were muffled around a faerie-sized mouthful of cake. "Let's eat!"

Severus somehow or another managed to get a piece of his own cake after moving Squash aside about ten times. It tasted horrible to say the least, but he managed to eat his piece without being sick. Besides, it was the thought that counted.

"Pretty nice birthday, huh Sev?" asked Lichen after the cake had been reduced to a pile of crumbs on his desk. There were currently faeries taking the remnants back with them for another splurge of indulgence. "Face it; you liked it."

"Thank you Lichen," Severus replied, dusting some cake crumbs off of his shoulder. Lichen had decided to enjoy the festivities from his shoulder and was as sloppy as ever. "That was the first time anyone made me a cake."

"Well then, we'll have to do it next year," Lichen said simply, settling once again on his shoulder. "And then the year after that and the year after that…"

And for the first time in his entire life, Severus Snape looked forward to his future birthdays.


	2. Stories 4 and 5

Disclaimer: All Harry Potter related characters belong to J.K. Rowling. Lichen and all the other faeries belong to me.

No Good Deed…

By: Ysidro

Story 4

Lichen watches Severus prepare a potion.

"What are you doing?" Lichen asked, cocking his head as he watched Severus prepare the ingredients for a potion. "Looks hard."

"If you must know Lichen, I am preparing the ingredients for a potion used to cure mumps."

"Oooo…what are you preparing?" Lichen asked as he flew closer to Severus' laboratory desk. He had learned to stay out of knife reach the hard way.

"I am cutting up maggots into equal pieces," Severus replied simply. "Not brain surgery, but it requires concentration."

Severus took out a pail full of maggots that were writhing in a squirmy pile. After years of making potions, the teacher was no longer squeamish. While most of his fellows would have run out the room in disgust or been sick on the stone floor, Snape just acted as if it was business as usual. He noticed that Lichen flew closer as he picked up the first maggot.

"Sev, it's talking!" Lichen said, an expression of fear on his face. "I can hear it talking."

"Bloody Hell, Lichen, what do you want now?" Severus set down his knife on the chopping block in disgust, a sneer on his face. "I am trying to make a living."

"That's what the maggot wants to be doing now Sev," Lichen's voice was deathly serious. "It wants to be living."

Lichen began to make squelching sounds while screwing up his face. Severus assumed the faerie was speaking maggot or something. Lichen was getting dangerously close to the chopping block, and if he wasn't careful, Severus would have to heal his wings for the umpteenth time.

"Then what the Hell is the damned maggot saying Lichen?" Severus asked impatiently. He still had marking to do and could not waste his time. "I know you're going to tell me, so do it now!"

"It's saying…" Lichen began to cup his hand over his ear. "It's saying not to kill it. It's saying it has its own maggot family that it provides for. It's saying it has a wife and kids Sev! If you kill it now, who will make a living for its little maggot children?"

Severus wasn't sure whether to be sad or disgusted. He had never thought of the maggots having families…let alone all of the other animals he had pickled chopped and mangled. He was confused about this…wrinkle in his usual routine. He dropped the maggot back in the bucket as he set his knife aside.

"HA!" Lichen yelled, flying around while doubled-over laughing. He could tell when Severus was hesitating. "You believed that? You believed that maggot story! And I thought I was gullible!"

"Shut up you damned sprite!" Snape laughed, smiling at his stupidity. He could handle spying for the Order of the Phoenix, but apparently could be talked into believing maggots could talk. "We both know maggots can't talk. Now let me be!"

"Don't let the animal-talent faeries hear you," Lichen said, smiling as he let Snape continue on with his work. "I'm just a prince; I can't talk to animals. But animal-talent faeries can speak to any animal. My friend Marigold can speak chipmunk, unicorn, phoenix, squid, and even blue jay. She could tell you what that maggot was saying, but something tells me you wouldn't want to know."

"I don't Lichen," was Severus' response.

However, Snape couldn't help but hesitate before continuing on with his chopping.

************

Story 5

Lichen, Squash, and Marigold find a quill.

"Is he here yet?" Squash whined as he fluttered near Snape's office door. "You said he'd be here soon Lichen."

"Oh be quiet Squishy," Marigold retorted, swatting her brother upside his orange-haired head. "If Prince Lichen says Severus will come, he will."

Squash stuck out his tongue at his sister as she turned her golden-locked head away. She flew over to Severus' desk with an interested look on her face. Lichen took this as a golden opportunity to show his ample knowledge of Snape's life, so he followed her to the desk.

"This is Severus' desk," he announced, puffing out his chest and waving his hand towards the pewter paper-weight he generally sat on. "You can sit here if you want to Goldie."

"Why thank you Your Highness," Marigold replied, curtseying before seating herself on the chair. "That was very kind of you."

"So, what does Severus do in here anyways?" Squash intervened as Lichen's face turned beet red. "You keep on telling us how great he is and all that, but what does he do?"

"Well, he…uh…marks!" Lichen said, flying to where a bunch of essays were sitting on the desk. "See, here's some of his marking…stuff."

"It doesn't look like much to me," Squash said. "Just a bunch of scribbles if you ask me."

"That's because it's not done yet!" Lichen protested. He couldn't risk Goldie losing interest and going back to the Village before she met Severus. "He has to put a letter on it."

"That's all he does…put a letter on the paper?" Goldie asked from her seat.

"There's a very complex code you have to use to let the students know how well they did," Lichen smiled as he gestured towards a spare quill lying beside Snape's inkwell. "Luckily, I know the code; Severus explained it to me once. Then he just dips the quill in the ink and writes the letter on the paper."

"I know!" Squash announced as he fluttered around like a possessed faerie. "We should do some of this marking for Severus to say thanks!"

Thus, Squash and Goldie handled the quill as Lichen explained the complex code system behind Severus' marking. Severus ended up not appearing until after dark, so the faeries had long since departed. The Potions teacher did not recollect ever marking the essays, but he had been under a lot of pressure preparing Pepper-Up potions for the Hospital Wing.

The next day, Neville Longbottom was surprised to find he had received an 'A' on his Potions' essay. In fact, the entire Griffindor House had received 'A's, which Hermoine Granger stated was because Professor Snape was not nearly as cold-hearted he appeared.

Draco Malfoy was even more shocked however, when he saw a large red 'L' on the front of his essay.


	3. Story 6

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters don't belong to me. Queen Clairion belongs to Disney. Lichen and all of the other faeries belong to me.

Author's Note: Sorry for the delay, but I've been busy the past few weeks. I have no idea why Lichen is so popular, but I'm happy he's been accepted. He was originally modeled after a Sidhe, which is a type of warrior faerie. For my next installment, I am in need of two names for animal-talent faeries. So, please review and I will use the names in future stories. Thanks for all the support!

No Good Deed…

Story 6

Lichen goes skiing.

By: Ysidro

It was the day after exams had ended. All of Snape's infernal students had gone home to see their loved or not so loved ones. Severus was sitting by the lake, his outer robes and waistcoat discarded in a black heap next to one of the many trees. He shut his eyes and breathed deeply; he had two months of blessed solitude ahead of him. All too soon, the tranquil scene was broken by the call of Snape's only friend.

"Howdy Sev!" called Lichen from the lake. Snape's eyes flew open in surprise. "Beautiful day isn't it?"

The prince of the faeries was water-skiing Severus supposed. Lichen's feet were tied to a pair of dragonflies with pieces of vine and he was skimming across the water. He let go of the rope for a moment and waved at Severus. Then, he hit the giant squid.

"Dammit Lichen!" Snape yelled as he got up. He quickly kicked off his shoes and socks while running towards the lake. "Can't you Bloody well watch where you're going?"

Reaching the edge of the lake, Snape dove into the murky water, hoping to Merlin that the giant squid would not consider him lunch. He rose to the surface, hearing the muffled cries of the soaking wet faerie not too far away. Of course, Lichen couldn't swim, his wings were wet, and he wasn't a water-talent faerie. The only talent he seemed to have was annoying Severus.

"Blasted faerie," he grumbled to himself as he swam across the Hogwarts Lake. He thanked Merlin that at least he could swim.

"HELP!" blubbered Lichen as the dragonflies began to fly in opposite directions and dunked his blonde head underwater. He came up, gasping for air, but continued to yell. "HELP SEVERUS!"

"You're fine you damned sprite," Severus said as he approached the waterlogged faerie.

The professor began to tread water, snatching his friend out of the lake. The giant squid looked at them questionably as Snape unfastened the prince from his protesting skis. After quick non-verbal drying spell, Lichen was flying around like normal. Now Snape just had to get to shore.

"Blast it!" Snape yelled as the giant squid decided he would make a nice meal. He felt one of the giant tentacles slither around his left ankle. "Lichen!"

"Oh, this is just jingly," Lichen said as he flew around, watching as Severus was unceremoniously dunked underwater. "If I could just talk to it…Severus, do you speak squid?"

"Get Marigold Lichen!" Severus managed to yell around a mouthful of water. Snape was reminded of stories of witches being dunked numerous times by Muggles to admit what they were. Unfortunately, reasoning with the Kraken was another story entirely.

"Oh, yeah. Goldie! Your Prince needs you!"

With a POP the blond faerie appeared next to her prince. She was wearing a scornful expression as she watched the giant squid attempt to eat Severus. Just before Snape was dragged towards the animal's gaping mouth, Marigold began to make squelching sounds. Snape supposed she was speaking giant squid.

Severus felt the pressure on his ankle slacken as the squelching continued. Frantically, Severus swam to shore, leaving Marigold to her conversation. He managed to heave himself onto the bank, gasping for breath and soaking wet.

"Are you okay Sev?" Lichen flew over with a look of concern on his face. "That was a close one."

"No thanks to you," Severus managed to gasp, his long black hair plastered to his face. "Now I have to explain why my clothes are so damned wet."

"Hey, your hair's not so shiny," Lichen interrupted, getting off topic as usual. Obviously, Severus having a near-death experience was not interesting enough. "And it's curly! Sev's got curly hair! Sev's got curly hair!"

Frantically, Snape began pulling at the numerous black curls framing his face. His hair had never been greasy; using vast amounts of gel was the only way to calm his damned curls. By the time Marigold fluttered toward the pair, Snape's lip was curling as well.

"Thank you Marigold," Snape said, ignoring the fact that Lichen was hovering next to his ear. "You saved my life."

"Anything to help a friend of Prince Lichen," she said, nodding towards the male faerie.

"What did you tell the Kraken anyways?"

"I told him you tasted like pickled maggots," was Marigold's simple reply before she disappeared.

Severus glared at the empty space where Marigold has once been, unsure whether to be offended or thankful. He picked himself up off of the grassy bank and stalked over to the tree where his outer robes were bundled. He ignored the fact that Lichen was buzzing behind him, begging his forgiveness in his high squeaky voice. Severus would let the prince stew in his own juices for a while before he accepted his apology.

As Severus trudged towards the Hogwarts castle, he suddenly began to crave calamari.


	4. Story 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or The Peanuts. Lichen is mine, as are all the other faeries.

Author's Note: I'm sorry this was a long time coming. I thought a little Christmas cheer in the middle of May was in order. As always, please review.

Next story up will be the epic battle of the faeries versus Fluffy!

Story #7

Lichen spreads Christmas cheer

If one was foolish enough to enter into the chambers of one Severus Snape, Potions Master, they would be surprised that his room is not completely barren. There is one piece of greenery that sheds a bit of light in his otherwise drab quarters. It is a single evergreen branch in a vase depicting a faerie battling a hawk. This is its story.

***************

"So, how do you like it?" Lichen asked, displaying his gift with a flourish. "Isn't it just jingly?"

Lichen was currently displaying his latest addition to Severus' chambers. Severus had explained Christmas to Lichen a few days before to help clear up some misunderstandings. Apparently the plant-talent faeries were not happy that their handiwork was annually chopped down by a very ferocious looking Big with a bushy nest on his face.

Rather than being angry at the destruction of his fellows' work, Lichen had taken the whole idea of Christmas back to the Faerie Village. He had given them the whole lecture about holly and mistletoe and reindeers and snow and a very fat Big that delivered presents to all the good Big children. Now all the damned sprites were filled to the brim with Christmas cheer.

Lichen decided that Severus needed his own Christmas tree to lighten up his room. It had taken ten faeries to bring it in, with the Prince of the Forbidden Forest Faeries at the head of the procession. They might as well have been carrying the Queen on a pedestal, they looked that proud.

It was a Christmas twig.

Severus wasn't sure if the "tree" would even hold a jingle bell, let alone a Christmas ball. Sadly, Severus had seen the Muggle special 'Charlie Brown's Christmas' and his gift bore a startling resemblance to the bald Muggle's tree. However, Mr. Brown's tree had one advantage over his; Charlie's could stand on its own. All ten of the faeries were supporting his twig's supposed trunk.

"It's…jingly Lichen," Severus couldn't help but say the term with a hint of bitterness in his voice. It sounded foreign coming from his mouth; a spying Death-Eater did not express happiness. Then again, with Lichen around all of the time, Severus found himself having to pretend on a daily basis that he was bitter to keep up appearances. It was rather odd. "Thank you."

"Okay everyone, you guys can leave now," Lichen said to his fellow faeries. "We're all set."

Obeying orders, all ten of the faeries let go of the "tree" in unison. They quickly flew off as Severus watched the twig tip over. It nearly squished Squash, who disappeared in a shower of sparkles just in time.

Lichen's face fell.

"Your…tree," Lichen said softly. "It fell."

Snape watched as the faerie began to cry. He had never seen Lichen cry before, and it was not as he expected. Instead of wailing like a minuscule banshee, the tiny pixie began to sob. His little shoulders were hunched and small tears trickled down his face. Severus awkwardly patted him on the back with a single finger.

"It's alright you silly sprite," Severus replied, pulling out his wand. Lichen looked up at his tall friend who was smiling in spite of himself. "It just needs a little…assistance is all."

With a flick of his wand and a silent spell, a silver vase materialized around the branch. A series of inexplicable lights began to meander about its dwindling branches as well. Faerie-sized Christmas balls in an array of colors hung themselves on the needles as well. Lichen was beaming within moments.

"Jingly!" Lichen yelled as he flew into the air, giving himself an aerial view of the Christmas twig. "It's beautiful! I knew you'd like it!"

"I appreciate your gift Lichen," Severus said, turning to the faerie as it settled on his shoulder. "However, I do not understand why you would bother getting me a tree. There are several large ones in the Great Hall, as all of your fellows have pointed out on numerous occasions. Why is this…tree…so important?"

Lichen cocked his head to the side in puzzlement. His blonde eyebrows furrowed as he flew over to the tree. The lights parted as he pointed to a grouping of pine needles.

"Don't you recognize it Sev? It's the branch that hawk attacked me on. The hawk you…saved me from."

Severus' eyes grew wide add the mere mention of the attack. Lichen hated to show weakness, as did Severus. The hawk attack had shown weakness in both of them; Lichen was not able to defend himself and Severus gave into a faerie's wails. Or did that branch show something more?

Bending down to study the evergreen branch, Severus thought it over. Lichen had learned humility because of this branch; for the first time in his life the faerie had accepted help. Severus had learned that having a friend was not a sign of weakness, but of strength. Lichen had surely tested the strength of his will on numerous occasions, and had in turn made him a better man.

It was the most…jingly Christmas twig in the world.

Lichen watched in awe as Severus muttered two incantations. The first would conserve the branch forever in the green and healthy state it was in. The other was another story. The vase began to engrave a picture of Lichen and the hawk engaged in an epic battle. Severus tweaked the scenario a bit, showing the hawk about to fly away in terror. He assumed Lichen would prefer the engraving that way.

He was wrong.

"That's not how it went!" Lichen said as he frantically pointed at the hawk. "It didn't fly away because of me; you were the hero. You have to be in there."

"Fine," Snape smiled as he rolled his eyes. The engraving changed slightly, showing part of Severus' hand trying to shoo the bird away. "There. I'm in the picture."

Lichen sighed in contentment as he settled down on Snape's desk in front of the twig. Snape sat down as well, pulling up a chair to enjoy the light show. It was almost peaceful as they looked at the vase in silence.

It was too good to be true.

"I think the hawk should be a bit more pointy…don't you?"


	5. Story 8

Disclaimer: Lichen and the faeries are mine, save Queen Clairion. All Harry Potter characters belong to J.K. Rowling.

A/N: As far as I can tell, this is Lichen's final story. This is how Severus managed to survive the wrath of Hagrid's Hell-mutt with his leg intact. If Lichen receives enough reviews, he may return for an encore.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The Final Story

Lichen meets a puppy.

According to Greek mythology, a three-headed dog guards the entrance to the Underworld. This massive security hound was called Cerberus, but Severus was fairly certain the mythology was incorrect. Currently, he was headed straight for a guard-dog named Fluffy who would undoubtedly send him to the Underworld if he failed.

As the teacher ran through the deserted corridors, he convinced himself it was worth it. If he died tonight, it would be defending Lily Potter's child. He was atoning for his sins and doing his duty as Lily's friend. Dying tonight would not be in vain.

The entrance to the third floor corridor loomed before him like the gates of Hell. A mumbled _Alohamora_ opened the flimsy lock and made Severus sigh. He would have thought Dumbledore would at least use a more powerful lock.

Of course, Fluffy was a big deterrent.

Enormous was a more suitable way to describe the slobbering hound that met Snape at the door the moment he opened it. Unfortunately, in order to complete his task, Snape had to go a few feet into the room. Fluffy did not come to lick his face like a blubbering idiot though; Fluffy wanted meat, and Snape looked like a mobile chew toy.

Perhaps he should have thought this out a bit more.

"S…S…Severus!" came the shocked voice of Professor Quirrell from in the room. "W…W…What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same damn thing!" Severus said, trying to edge himself closer to the refuge of the doorway. "Get out of here you bloody idiot!"

Quirrell let out a squeak of astonishment as he tried to inch his way to the door. Fluffy's heads watched both of them eagerly, deciding which was more appetizing. Did the dog want his meat greasy, or slathered in garlic? It was such a tough decision for something with three brains.

Fluffy preferred grease.

Severus let out a cry of agony as he felt one of the mouths clamp around his right leg. Both feet flew out from under him, and his chin bashed onto the marble floor. The coppery taste of blood flooded into his mouth as he realized he had bitten his tongue as well.

"Get out of here Quirrell!" Snape managed to croak despite the pain in his leg. "Now!"

Quirrell did not need to be told twice. The Defense teacher ran out the door and let it slam behind himself. Severus watched in distain as his last chance of getting out of this mess alive deserted him in a cloud of garlic-scented dust.

Then, his faerie god-father came to rescue him.

"Howdy Sev!" Lichen said, popping into existence with a puff of sparkles. "Isn't Halloween just Jingly? Free candy…dressing up like scary things…I'm dressed as a hawk!"

When Lichen did not receive any sort of criticism with regards to his costume, he finally noticed that Severus was currently being hung upside-down by a three-headed dog. Fluffy's right and left heads were snapping at Snape's head while the middle had its mouth firmly clamped on his pant-clad leg. Snape's cloak had since fallen off and was in a crumpled heap on the floor. The Potions teacher was dodging nips in his waistcoat and shirt-sleeves, hair flying in all directions.

"That's a big doggy," Lichen said, cocking his head to the side. "This just proves you shouldn't play with strange dogs Sev."

"Help Lichen!" Snape yelled, dodging another bite. "The damn dog's trying to bite off my head!"

"You shouldn't talk to it that way Sev," Lichen scolded as he flew a bit farther away from the dog. "How would you like it if I talked to you like that?"

"I'd prefer if you didn't talk at all!" Snape shot back.

In the heat of the moment, Snape did not realize the implications of that simple statement. Lichen began to sob great faerie tears, his entire body wracked with sobs. Severus tried to make amends, but his blasted tongue had begun to swell making talking nearly impossible. He watched with dismay as Lichen disappeared in another poof of sparkles.

The next moments were the longest Severus could recall. At first he dodged the dog's bites with vigor, but slowly his energy began to fade. He had just dismissed his one and only friend like a discarded play thing. Maybe he was getting his just deserts.

"Okay, here it is Antidesma," came a familiar voice from out of thin air. "This is Fluffy; the only three-headed dog in the universe. Isn't he a beauty?"

Severus watched as Lichen appeared once again, this time with another infernal pixie. She was a chubby female faerie with a rose-petal dress and hair the color of an overcast sky. She scowled at Snape, but her eyes brightened at the sight of Fluffy.

"My goodness!" she breathed in delight as she hovered near the slobbering canine. "What a fabulous specimen! Oh, Prince Lichen you are a truly honorable faerie. You will make a fabulous ruler one day!"

"Thank you Desma," Lichen blushed as he pointed to Severus. "But I think that horrible human may interfere with Fluffy's health. You know how human limbs can make three-headed dogs very sick."

"Stupid human," the fat faerie mumbled as she approached Fluffy's snapping jaws. "Trying to hurt this poor, innocent doggy were you? Well, we'll just have to put an end to that."

Desma began to make a sound that seemed to be a combination of growling and barking. There were a few whimpers in there as well. Snape could not believe that odd noise was coming from the rotund sprite, but if he got out of this mess, he'd believe anything.

Then, his face met the floor.

By the time Snape had re-gained his footing and his cloak, the faerie, Desma was gone. Fluffy continued slobbering in the corner, but apparently had no more taste for greasy meat. As Severus stood up, his hooked nose met a very irritated Lichen.

"What do you say?" Lichen asked in an I-told-you-so manner.

"I'm sorry Lichen," Snape managed to sputter around his swollen tongue. "Thank you for the help."

"You still owe me though," Lichen replied as Snape unlocked the entrance to the Underworld and slid back into the corridor.

The teacher ran down the hallways as fast as his injured limb would let him, a trail of sparkles indicating that Lichen was still watching over him. The infernal glitter continued to stick by him even as he discovered the group of teachers outside of the girls' lavatory. He managed to hide Lichen as he got closer, muffling the faerie's cries by bunching his cloak around him. Lichen only saw the light of day when Severus was safely in his chambers.

"Well that was uncomfortable," Lichen complained as Snape let him out of the folds of his cape. "Not exactly the way you should treat someone who just saved your life."

"I had no choice," Snape replied, allowing Lichen to sit on the edge of his small personal desk like a sparkly knick knack. "If you were seen…"

"Yeah, I get it," Lichen brushed it off as he ruffled his wings. "Now it's down to business."

"And what business would that be?" Snape raised an eyebrow as Lichen grinned.

"It's Halloween!" Lichen beamed as he sprang up and did a twirl in mid-air. "It's time for CANDY!"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

That night, Minky, the unfortunate house-elf responsible for Professor Severus Snape's room service, was surprised to have the teacher place an order. She completed it with expert efficiency and delivered it to his room personally. When the elf popped into the teacher's room with a plate of Pumpkin Pasties, she was surprised to see a very life-like faerie statue on Snape's desk.

And the teacher's black cloak was sparkling.


	6. Story 9

Disclaimer: I own Lichen and all faeries except Queen Clairion. Oh, and Professor Thatcher is mine, since I have no clue who is the Muggle Studies teacher; as well as Lucinda Thatcher. Unfortunately, so is Larry Hawke. The rest belong to J.K. Rowling.

A/N: Lichen is back and is taking up an offer. Thus comes the next story.

(Let's just say, Lichen wasn't listening when he was told not to talk to strangers.)

CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D

Story 9

Lichen takes a bribe.

"I cannot believe you let me take you here," Snape snarled as he opened his pocket. The pocket was already turning sparkly and Lichen had only been in there for a few minutes. "You could compromise your entire world by accompanying me."

"But they have CANDY!" Lichen squeaked happily, jumping up and down, causing another glitter explosion. The silver specks poofed out of his pocket and cascaded onto his robes. "I LOVE candy!"

"Well, you will just have to wait and see if I can get you to Honeydukes without being noticed," Snape replied. "I cannot jeopardize my position because of your need for sugary confections. Besides, I need to watch the children."

Upon closing his pocket, Severus realized he was being watched.

Professor Mark Thatcher was the most Muggle-looking wizard on the face of the planet. He nearly had to be forced into his robes every dinner and taught his classes in button-down shirts and upon occasion, jeans of all things. He had the world's most unwizardly ties, which included one with rubber-duckies, one with a vacuum cleaner and one with a bunch of toasters that would whisper to you when you passed him by. Thatcher was wearing one such tie now, this one decorated with a series of light bulbs that lit up the moment something magical approached them. Snape hated him more than Lupin, Potter, and Black altogether.

"You okay Professor?" Mark managed to say, walking up to his colleague. "I thought I heard you talking to yourself."

"It was probably those stupid toasters on your tie," Snape snapped. "They're completely and utterly inappropriate."

"It's our day off Severus," Thatcher replied, keeping up with Snape's long strides. The two men were exact opposites, yet they stood at approximately the same height. Thatcher was one of the few teachers who could look Snape straight in the eye, and that irritated and scared him as well. "Why don't you just enjoy it for once? Come on; let's go get a FireWhiskey or something."

"If you are attempting to ask me on a date, I will kill you right now. I don't care how many students see. They will probably thank me for it."

"Of course not Sev!" Thatcher said, slapping him on the back. "I'm married, remember to my lovely wife Lucinda, remember?"

How could Severus forget? Thatcher's wedding had been as Muggle as it could possibly be. It wasn't even the wedding he hated as much as the fact Thatcher had made him a member of the wedding party. He had looked ridiculous in a Muggle suit, and would never live it down. Still, it was nice to be considered someone's friend once in a while. It was even better when that person did not leave your robes sparkly.

"I shall take your offer into consideration," was Snape's simple reply as he glanced down at his pocket. "I do however have some errands to attend to."

"I'll meet you at the Hog's Head then!" Mark smiled, nearly skipping off to the tavern through a group of kids; his tie flapping in the wind. "Have a good day Professor Snape."

Snape stalked off, pushing past more students and pretending to be invisible. If anyone heard him actually being decent to Thatcher of all people, he would be ruined. He entered a deserted alleyway between two buildings and let Lichen out.

"You…you said…" Lichen managed to stammer as he flew out of Snape's pocket. "You said you'd kill him!"

"It's only a figure of speech Lichen," Snape explained, trying to comfort the fairy. But it was too late; Lichen was crying once again. "I wasn't going to kill Thatcher."

"Are you going to try and kill me?" Lichen said his eyes wide with terror. "Are you going to do it since I'm nice to you?"

"Don't be stupid Lichen," Snape sneered at the faerie. "I wouldn't kill you."

"No, you're the one who's stupid!" Lichen yelled, as he flew away into the village. "You make everyone who's nice to you go away! Well, I'm going away too!"

With that, Lichen disappeared, leaving a shower of faerie tears behind instead of sparkles.

CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D

"He's so prickly!" Lichen sobbed into a leaf handkerchief as he flutter between Honeydukes and another shop. "I'll never get the thorns out of him…NEVER!"

"There there little faerie," came the reassuring voice of another male wizard behind him. "You shouldn't get so worked up about things like that; some people can't help but be mean."

"Who are you?" Lichen said, tucking his handkerchief away and allowing his glow to brighten. "Why are you being so nice to me?"

"Let's just say I'm a collector," the man smiled; his teeth straight and white. He was neatly groomed and appeared far less intimidating than Severus. "I collect different types of candy."

"CANDY!" Lichen beamed, as the man took out a Pumpkin Pasty. "I LOVE CANDY!"

"I thought you would," the man said as Lichen began to scarf down the treat. "All faeries love candy; it's in their nature. Being extremely stupid is also one of their more desirable traits."

Before Lichen knew it, he was clasped between the man's two hands. He struggled to get free, but faeries are not very good when they are in a confined space. Any passing student would just think Larry Hawke had caught a rat.

Hawke smiled as he shoved the faerie in his zippered pocket. He was a fine specimen; a fine one indeed. An upper-class faerie was always good, they made the best ingredients. This stupid sprite would make his potions customers very happy.

"Hello Hawke," came a soft voice that Larry recognized immediately. It was one of his prized customers; not everyone served Hogwarts' Potions Master. He would be very pleased to know that faerie wings would be well-stocked.

"Salutations Professor Snape," Hawke replied, tipping his ever-present fedora at the wizard. "What brings you here?"

"I could ask the same of you," Severus said. "I have students to supervise. What are you doing?"

"Browsing," Hawke said non-chalantly. "Have to get the wife a birthday present, you know."

"Have you gotten her anything yet?" Snape raised an eyebrow as he flicked his eyes towards the man's pocket. "Something she would enjoy?"

"You know my Debbie's a very picky woman," Hawke smiled. With brown hair and robes, he rather resembled the bird of prey. "But maybe I'll get lucky."

"You are lucky Laurence," Snape sneered, jabbing a finger at his sparkly pocket. "You're lucky I'm not going to report you to the Ministry for faerie-hunting out of season. Now let that faerie out at once before I make sure you never work again!"

Hawke's eyes grew wide as the surly teacher made him release the faerie. Lichen flew out in a shower of sparkles, covering the collector with glitter from head to toe. Snape watched in amusement as Hawke ran off, trying desperately to get the glitter out of his hair. When the man was a decent distance away, he burst into laughter.

"Is there really a faerie-hunting season?" Lichen asked, a worried look on his face. "Should I warn my parents?"

"I made all that up," Snape smiled as the faerie sat on his shoulder. "And the fool actually believed me!"

"Good," Lichen said, his past woes forgotten. "He was more prickly than a nettle."

"Oh, I got you this," Snape said, taking out a package of Every-Flavor Beans. He had shrunk it so that it was Lichen-sized. "I hope you enjoy them. However, you will have to eat them in my pocket for the time being. I have a…friend to meet."

And with Lichen in his pocket munching away happily on his candy, Snape stalked off towards the Hog's Head to meet Mark Thatcher for a drink.

CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D CANDY:D

Hope you enjoyed it and please review!


End file.
